The Dysfunctional Pilgrim

I'm sorry. I just had to do this...... KRIS ALLEN WON AMERICAN IDOL 2009!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm tired. I'm so, so tired of fighting....my exams. Now i know what a war is like...nothing but an endless mass of gore and violence and pain and sorrow. Everyday you pull on your armour, and rush to the front lines to fight and defend, till every part of your body aches and you wish you can just lay down and die. I hate the long exams, they drag on forever and i don't even feel happy when they are over...i just feel like sleeping and never waking up. It doesn't help when the exams were a fiasco too. An ultimately I just wonder what's the point of it all. I know i did very badly this time around, and I got no one to blame but myself. I'm the type who needs a lot of time to grasp certain knowledge, and I didn't make that time. I was so busy. But I can't use that as an excuse cause Ara and Shaki and Clement ( the mighty mindz ) were busy too...and I know they did well no matter what they say. Argh ! And now I need to study real hard for my bible knowledg...

yes, I'm suppose to talk about gala. Unfortunately, I have a terrible, formidable enemy which is the midyear exams...sigh. So I would be involved in a war for about three weeks....and it's a slim chance I would win this one... Which means I won't be around to write about how gala rocked until it's over so i'm here to say sorry for the delay. Now is you'd excuse me, I need to prepare my troops and weaponry. May your swords stay sharp!

I still had post-gala euphoria (which totally ROCKED, tell u more nxt time), when I found it . It was math period, and I was, in a way, the teacher's assistant in handing up the math exercise papers...that was all we did nowadays, cause she finished the entire syllabus last year. So I was rushing to give back all the papers she had marked and hand up the papers to her so that I can go back and do my OWN work which had been neglected for goodness knows how long. I opened the drawer, reached in to check if I had forgotten any papers and it just slipped into my hand. A perfect fit. Manila cards, neatly cut to fit the palm of my hand, in colours of yellow and pink. Debate cards. Debate. KGV. Rats. I let out a humongous sigh, the pain of it all came rushing back. I guess I haven't gotten over it. I thought I had. But the twisting pain was still there, breaking my heart. The recovery is taking longer than I thought. Why? I mean, we lost last year too, but I didn't feel this bad. ...

I suppose you know we lost in debates.... What am I suppose to say? We were the winners and everyone knew it. And I mean everyone . So why do these things happen? Whatever happen to fairness and equality? I suppose you could say that this is life, this is how it has always been. I should accept it, right? But I can't. I just can't. I am depressed. I really love debating. Not just because it is an English language activity; I love what it is, the very core. The sights the air around the debate hall, the electricity when debating. I love the eloquence and the play of words, the twist of the language to beautiful and intricate knots. I love every single minute of debates; the discussions, the practices, the competitions. Debates is my first love. Why else would I pick it over drama and public speaking? Why else would I throw my entire self into it? And to know that we lost our chance of winning, for the first and last time, because of discrimination and injustice, the very thing...

Haha, I promised you guys by the end of that week, didn't I? So sorry... Anyway, I wonder what I should update on, because prefect camp is like so over, and prefect gala hasn't started...Interschool CF is so over, and the camp hasn't started...sort of like in between things now. I think I should say a few things about prefect camp. I think it's the best prefect camp EVER!!!!! Namely because we the AJKS organized it, but trust me, it was no joke...we had more stress before the camp than during the camp. I feel that it's the best prefect camp so far because every activity had its purpose. A very clear purpose, I mean. And I'm glad we made it clear to the prefects wgat the purpose was. I'm sure previous camps had their purposes as well, but because they didn't make it so clear, it kind of felt like a meaningless torture camp. Sorry to any of the ex-AJKS reading this, but that's how I felt. Ouch. Anyway, the biggest bummer was me losing my voice, and al...

hi, bye. Yes, that's how busy I am nowadays, very sorry to all who are so eagerly (funnily enough) following my blog. I want to wite on a lot of things, and I promise that by this week I'll put a post up, but right now I really can't. It's funny apologizing when in the first place this blog is for myself but now I can see that it's for others too. So once again I'm on my knees craving your pardon on my slowness to update and hoping that you will make my dreams come true by forgiving me and giving me one thing I need right now : time.